Festive season is over. New year had begun. It will be a while before the gift giving frenzy starts. Some decide it is too much to give gifts and not give at all. Others do ‘chris cringles’, select one person to give, and yet others give everybody either happily or begrudgingly. However, during the lead up to Christmas just about everyone has this exasperated sigh in their conversation – “I haven’t even started my Christmas shopping yet”, “I don’t know what to give”, “I might just give a gift card or money, they can get what they want”… etc., etc,
Is gift giving a token gesture or is it more than that? Why do we give gifts anyway? Can we be unacceptable to each other during the entire year and expect to change that through a token gesture? Lot of questions that I am sure we ponder upon every year during the festive season.
We all want to do the best for the other. We want to give as giving is our nature.
Did you ever stop to think of the greatest gift that we can ever give to each other? Is there such a thing as greatest gift?
Yes there is…
The greatest gift that we can give is…….
“Allowing others TO BE….”
Sad, Mad or Glad;
Silly or Jolly;
Content or Discontent;
or any number of combinations that we find expressed as human nature.
Allowing others TO BE, without judgment, criticisms, opinions, approval, disapproval etc., etc, is the greatest gift we can give each other.
Why is this a greatest gift?
1. It maintains human harmony.
2. It maintains personal health. When we have no judgments on others, we have no issues with our emotional status ( no imbalance). Emotional imbalance is a primary cause for dis-ease.
3. It brings social cohesion through transparency. Allowing others ‘TO BE’ helps them to make choices freely. As people can relate to us as they are, our friendships improve. Others find it comfortable to be in our presence.
4. This gift has no ‘expiry date’ or ‘return policy’ and is perpetual as well as refreshingly new each time.
Is it easy to give a gift?
Yes, only if we are comfortable in who we are.
Often, we judge in others what we find in ourselves as unacceptable. Our disappointments and frustrations increase as our expectations are not met and we end up withdrawing Love or limiting our love.
When we are comfortable in our own skin and have accepted ourselves completely and unconditionally, then we have the capacity to accept the other completely and unconditionally. We do this well with strangers but often fail to do this with people who are close to us.
The key to get to this state of being is to acknowledge the source of power within, which is the same in everyone and ignore the outer boundaries or shells. The source within wants only one thing – to express itself grandly. That expression is only possible when we allow it through acceptance.
If it is such an easy to give gift, why do we hesitate to do so…
because we are not taught how to do this. We are living and growing in times where blame is the name of the game and expecting everybody else to change is the rule to win the game. Allowing others ‘to be’ is a threat to our identity. We exclusively talk about being inclusive. The distinctive differences in appearances firmly keep us entrenched in our ‘us’ and ‘them’ thinking and we poke our heads through our silos and extend our hands over to make friendships. We ‘tolerate’ each other than ‘understand’ each other. Tolerance hardens the walls of the silos whilst understanding makes them porous.
What can we do to promote ‘understanding and acceptance’
When we put ourselves in the other’s shoes and judge our actions against that background, understanding will improve and acceptance follows when we are being ourselves.
So, the the greatest gift that we can give others is allowing them TO BE and the key to do this is to be understanding and accepting of ourselves as we are.
Isn’t that a double pronged gift?
What do you think?
Agree or disagree – leave a comment. Would love to hear from you.
Until Next Week
With Love and Respect
PS: New Year resolution of mine to write this blog once a week and post every Saturday. I know today is Sunday, I missed it because I wasn’t well yesterday. But I intend to keep to this schedule of posting every Saturday and I hope you will join me on Saturday’s. Your suggestions on topics also is most welcome.